Thorpe Park

August 28 - August 29

Saturday, Steve and I went to Thorpe Park. First we went to Waterloo Station and got on the National Rail toward Staines. I saw an interesting looking building as the train left the station, which I Wikipedia-ed and found that it was Strata SE1 (informally known as The Razor).

We got to the park a little bit early so we were forced to wait in a fairly long line to get tickets. Once inside, the first coaster we went for was called Stealth, which I will describe later. On the way, we crossed a bridge and got a very pretty view.

Then we saw one of those raft rides that huge splashes, only this splash was huger than any I (or you) have ever seen. The water from this splash could be felt over a football field away. Anyway, we got to Stealth and it was closed down. Next we headed to Nemesis Inferno. Nemesis Inferno was an inverted coaster that could best be described as short but sweet.

Then we headed to Colossus, a steel coaster with 10 INVERSIONS, five of which are barrel rolls, four of which are consecutive. Now, I have had a pulled neck muscle for about 10 days at this point so this ride BEAT THE CRAP OUT OF ME. That being said, it was a very fun ride.

Oh, I'm sorry. Do I have 10 INVERSIONS?

"Do a barrel roll!" - Peppy

Next we went to Saw: The Ride, which was themed to the movie Saw. In the line, I got so bored that I started taking pictures of the ominous Saw sky. I think the mood speaks for itself.

Hardcore.

 In terms of theming, this ride could not be beat. There were torture contraptions all over the place. There was a corpse, and during the ride, you get a blood splatter on you (or Steve did anyway). This wound up being my second favorite ride of the day.

His most dastardly plot yet.

Next we went on The Slammer, which was one of the most extreme flat rides I had ever been on. It was essentially a double-sided fly swatter. This ride was excellent except that when you I went backwards and ended up on my back, I felt kind of sick. Anyway, in case you are having a hard time picturing this contraption, here it is.

It's like swatting at the floor with a fly attached to the swatter.

We then noticed that Stealth was open and headed toward it. We ended up in a huge line (after waiting 2 hours, we realized we could have done the single rider line in about 10 minutes), though it provided for interesting sites. I should mention that there were gardens and green spaces all over the park, even in the queue for this primarily Jaws-themed ride. Stealth is a launch coaster that launches you at 80 mph, sending you upward 205 feet in the air. Then you go down and over a short hill. If think that this sounds suspiciously like Kingda Ka (same track layout, 456 feet tall, 128 mph), you are right.

FEAR 45% of Kingda Ka's height and FEAR 63% of its speed.

The queue actually took us under the track... RIGHT UNDER the track. I would never be able to get these shots in the States.

Anyway, Stealth was good but not great, definitely not worth 2 hours but definitely worth 10 minutes.

Onto my favorite ride, Rush, a screamin' swing (a really big f*ing swing). I cannot describe the feeling I get on it but it is incredible. I rode a slightly higher and better version at Cedar Point, but this is still now one of my favorite flat rides of all time. Here is what it looks like.

Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!! And no push required.

After Rush, we went on X:/No Way Out. That was not a typo. We think the ride is supposed to be themed to some kind of computer virus. This coaster went backwards the whole time, which made me really, really sick. It also stopped at various points and kind of jerked backward then forward (repeat a few times), which made me even sicker. I would not go on that again. I have no pictures because it was indoors and it was almost pitch black.

After this Steve and I went to a claw machine and got a Luigi for him (he needed one because they are apparently kind of uncommon in the U.S.). The battle with the claw machine was epic but we eventually won.

The next ride we went to was a kid's ride called Mr. Monkey's Banana ride. It was a swinging pirate ship ride except replace the pirate ship with a banana. It was kind of cute though.

C'mon kids. Ride Mr. Monkey's banana.

Next was a log flume, Logger's Leap, which was themed to a stereotyped Canada. You read that correctly. There was a song playing in the queue about trees and rocks. In case you think you know this song and think it is a song by The Arrogant Worms, you are wrong. This song ACTUALLY glorified trees and rocks for 4 minutes. Here are some lyrics I remember.

"Trees and rocks and rocks and trees and trees and rocks and rocks and trees..."

"Miles and miles and miles and miles of treeeeeeeees..."
"Piles and piles and piles and piles of rooooooooocks..."

I don't have any pictures of the ride but there was a fun challenge on it (prompted by a sign): see how many bears (fake) you can find. We found 2.

For the end of the day, Steve rode Colossus again (I sat out because of my neck). Then he rode The Slammer again (I sat out because it made me sick). Finally we both rode Rush again (I enjoyed it more than him).

We exited the park and passed over that bridge again, so I looked at the other side.

Afterward we got on the train and set off. When coming into the station, we saw the top of the London Eye was glowing. So we went to check it out.

Sunday was exceptionally disappointing. We went to the Notting Hill Carnival, only to find that it was basically a giant block party... for hundreds of blocks. I'll summarize Sunday with this.